“The fuck do you want?”
Seeing hatred in the eyes of his mate was something Baz had
grown used to from Charlie over the years, but today it was harder somehow, or
maybe it was the fact that he didn’t have his vest on to buffer him from it.
Karma. The fates. Who knew what entities orchestrated the
swirling black and gray bond marks that had appeared upon his wrist almost
eighteen years ago, he just wish they’d chosen better. That or made him a
better wolf, to actually be deserving of the mates they’d given him.
“Five minutes of your time and a conversation,” Baz replied,
feeling none too hopeful his request would be granted.
Instead of opening the door for him, Charlie’s shrewd eyes
appraised him thoroughly. “Where’s your Kutte?”
“Burnt up in a bonfire last night.”
“Shame you weren’t in it when it happened.”
“Who says I wasn’t?”
“You’re looking awful good for a crispy critter?”
“That you saying I still look good?”
“Compared to a charred bag of bones, maybe. If a wolf was
desperate enough, they might decide you were worth a night of fun.”
“Any chance you’re that desperate?”
“Not a one.”
“Damn,” Baz remarked, disappointment hammering down at him,
despite having expected the answer. The whole moment felt surprisingly out of
place like time had spun backward, hurling them through time to a moment when
there had been friendship between them.
“You gonna tell me why you’re here, or waste some more of my
morning?
“Can I get a cup of coffee while we have this conversation?”
“Nope, would take more than five minutes for it to brew, and
you’ve burned two minutes already.”
Throwing up his hands, Baz considered just walking away,
only, he had three minutes left to stare at the wolf he’d spent over a decade
missing and mourning, drowning in regret over the things he desperately wanted
to say and didn’t dare.
Brooks had called him a coward when all these years Baz had
believed it a noble, honorable thing he did, trying to preserve a relationship
that had always been important to Charlie, even at the cost of something Baz
had desperately wanted, despite how many times he denied it.
Good intentions will kill ya.
Hadn’t Charlie told him that when they were pups and hadn’t
Baz laughed, still too optimistic to realize that some wolves could practically
kill themselves trying and still fail as spectacularly as a matchstick in a
downpour?
“And now you’ve burned three,” Charlie griped, letting the
door bang shut behind him, no doubt to keep any more of his cold air from
spilling out the door and air conditioning the forest. “You plan to keep
staring at me and waste the other two or tell me why the fuck you’re over here
so god damned early in the day.
“How’s Kale?” Baz blurted because that could be considered a
natural topic and one he was genuinely interested in.
“Same as he was when you called yesterday,” Charlie replied.
“If something were wrong, I’d text you.”
“I um, got him a phone, in case he ever wanted to talk,” Baz
replied, pulling it from the pocket of his jeans and holding it out, not that
Charlie took it.
“Already took care of that, weeks ago, when I brought him
here. Thought you trusted me to keep him safe? Wasn’t that the whole point of
me bringing him out here?” Charlie replied, checking his watch. “You’re going
to be late.”
“Shops closed for the day.”
“Why the fuck is it closed, it ain’t a holiday and there are
orders to take care of. you know that,” Charlie snapped.
“And I will get them done,” Baz huffed. “Just didn’t need
the music, noise and constant god damned conversations today, so I told the
other three not to come in.”
“What part of structure and responsibility do you not
understand,” Charlie growled, “These wolves are assigned there because they
need guidance, supervision and purpose. I will not have you fucking up the
whole program with some selfish whim.”
“First of all, let’s get something straight right now. I
take my responsibilities seriously, even those that are thrust on me by someone
wanting to hold shit over my head so they can make me squirm. Niko has been
using the skills he’s learned in the shed to revamp some things over at his
grandparents’ place and Sierra offered to help him, so that’s what they’re
doing today. I made sure they had supplies and I told them that if they got
stuck they could take a picture of the problem and send it to me, or you and
we’d talk them through it.”
“And you were going to tell me this when, exactly?” Charlie
asked, his impatience showing, as it always did whenever they spoke. “When I
was staring at a message trying to figure out what the fuck it was about?”
“I’m here, we’re talking, that was all part of why I dropped
in, and to say that as of midnight, Cage is the new president of the Howling
Devils, may the fates have mercy on his soul.”
Snorting, Charlie shook his head. “And what exactly is the
response you were hoping for?”
Shrugging, Baz met his gaze, the brilliant colors always
hitting him like he was seeing them the first time, mesmerizing. Should have
stayed in that moment and never moved. Maybe then everything wouldn’t be so
broken and fucked all to hell.
“Hell if I know,” Baz rumbled, scrubbing a hand through his
hair. Everything was off-kilter, slipping sideways and drifting into that
surreal realm he’d found himself dropping into ever since he’d made the
decision not to keep his kutte after he stepped down as president.
“Well, good thing that’s settled, then. You can be going
now, and make sure you don’t leave a fuckin’ mess for me to clean up when I get
back there,” Charlie remarked, turning away.
“Someday, I hope we can have a conversation the way we used
to,” Baz said, voice low and as controlled as he could manage, which wasn’t
easy when he wanted to snap and snarl, howl, growl and demand Charlie put the
past aside for one day, one fuckin’ day.
“You should know better than that by now. If I was going to
forgive you, it would have been back then, when I still believed you were
looking for the bastard who really assaulted those wolves, not letting them pin
the whole damn thing on me.”
Huffing, all Baz could do was stand there with his fists
clenched, hating that every attempt at conversation between them someone came
back to this one point of contention.
“I think you’ve always known who was responsible, but it was
easier to let me take the fall than test club loyalties by bringing the real
perpetrator to justice,” Charlie said. “After all, I was just a prospect. A
throwaway. Someone on the fringe you could cut ties with and not have to suffer
any consequences.”
There was a moment when everything froze, and Baz opened his
mouth to admit the truth. That he had known, that he did know, and had suffered
every day since that information had wound up in his hands. Why someone else
couldn’t have been made privy to it, like Brooks, who would have known how to
handle things differently, he’d never understand. That had been all fate, like
the split vote that had left him president when the goddess knew he was the
wrong person for the job.
“I thought so,” Charlie remarked over his shoulder, their
eyes meeting again, the hate in Charlie’s as bright as ever, right before he
disappeared back inside. Baz was two blocks away when it dawned on him that he’d
never said what he’d gone to Charlie’s to say.
Another missed opportunity in a string so numerous it was
embarrassing to think about. Lately, there were very few positive things to
speak of, at least not in his life, where the banner accomplishment was the
discovery that it hadn’t been a member of the Howling Devils that had been
working with the traffickers, but rather, someone hell-bent on destroying them
from the inside out.
Sins and secrets.
Grudges and revenge.
The Devils might have been all about protecting pack, but
they’d stomped on more than a few paws doing it, and some hadn’t been justified,
despite what they’d told themselves.
You can find Book 1, Waiting for Raine here!
Book two, Howl Down the Moon, will be released in January, but the first chapter can be read here!
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