Monday, December 12, 2022

Matesummer Monday: Outlaws Redeemed - The kind of mate he didn't want


Coming January 31, 2023


Chapter 1 


Emery, are you illiterate, or just too stupid to understand when someone wants nothing at all to do with you?

Hands shoved in his pockets, Emery stared down at the neon orange words painted in the brilliant white snow, his heart hammering erratically while other wolves gave a wide berth as they passed. A few snickered, but one called out to him: “Give it up, man. It’s beyond sad now.”

The wolf was right, and Emery knew it. He’d managed two weeks without leaving another note for his mate to find, but late last night, after the snow stopped and the rest of the town was silent, he’d crept back to the square. With the way the weather had been changing lately, it was probably the final snow of the season, his last chance to leave a message in what he was coming to think of as “their spot.” A glutton for punishment, that’s what he was. The whole time he was painting his question in the snow, he’d told himself he was being an absolute fool by hoping his mate would reconsider wanting to meet him.

That message had been drawn through with several angry black lines and stomped with heavy bootprints—clearly conveying his mate’s state of mind. The wolf wasn’t just annoyed now, but angry that Emery kept trying to get to know them, which was made perfectly clear by the second line of his response.

If you were the only other wolf left in the universe, I’d choose to die alone rather than ever spend a single second in your company. Now leave me the fuck alone before I tell the people you’re running from where you are and how to find you.

Shaking, Emery felt the first stirrings of a panic attack kicking in. He knew. His mate knew who he really was. Kicking at the snow, he scattered it, destroying the message, and leaving little more than splatters of orange randomly dotting the trampled mess. Glancing around, he saw several wolves watching from the sidewalks, others with their heads together, whispering. At least they stopped short of pointing at him.

Some faces he recognized; others he didn’t, and one…

He couldn’t breathe. Clawing at the zipper of his coat, he tried to undo it, but his field of vision was narrowing, and his hands fumbled like he forgot what to do. Finally, he just yanked it off over his head, nearly choking himself in his haste. The T-shirt he wore beneath offered no real protection from the elements, not that he cared, as he let the coat slip from his fingers.

Blinking, he struggled to focus, telling himself there was no way in hell the wolf watching from the sidewalk was Sydney. Sy was dead. There was no coming back from getting one’s head taken off by a tow chain.

Logic wasn’t enough to slow his heartbeat or still the twitching in his fingers and the panicked urge to run and hide somewhere no one would think to look for him. Even when the guy moved and sunlight struck his hair, showing shades of reds and golds shimmering in brown strands that weren’t dull like Emery’s, it was difficult to separate what he was seeing from his memories.

“Come on, let’s get you out of here.”

The voice in his ear, and the soft touch on his arm, now that grounded him. Only one person in his life had ever sounded like that, and he was grateful as hell for Zane’s appearance now. The small wolf picked up his coat and handed it back to him. Emery hugged it to his chest when he did. He’d have stood there like his feet were glued to the snow if Zane hadn’t taken charge and steered him away from the square and the remnants of those spray-painted words.

Zane said nothing as they walked. He just steered Emery down the street and around the corner, directing him the whole four blocks back to the apartment he and Dalton shared. It was a good thing too, because Emery couldn’t manage to get his brain to kick in gear and take over. Even inside, it was Zane who propelled him to sit at the kitchen table, Zane who put the kettle on for tea, and Zane who hung up both their coats before getting the mugs ready. His one pause was to pull out his cell phone and type a simple text, probably to his mates.

“They threatened to tell the Outlaws how to find me,” Emery said softly. “In their message in the snow, they said to leave them alone, or they’d tell the people I was running from how to find me.”

“How’d they find out about them and who you really are?”

Emery looked at him and threw his hands up. “I don’t know. None of you would have told them.”

“Who else knows?”

“Just your dad and Cormac, and they wouldn’t have said anything either.”

“You’ve never performed under your true name, and we’ve never performed anywhere near Outlaw territory,” Zane mused. “They’d have had to contact different packs until they’d found someone who could identify you.”

“Which means even if they didn’t tell them where I was yet, they know I’m still alive, they know what I’ve changed my name to, and they know I’m a member of the band,” Emery said, the ramifications of that hitting like a crowbar to the back of the knees. He was glad he was sitting, or he’d have wound up on the kitchen floor. “I can’t perform anymore.”

“Bullshit,” Zane said as he rounded the table to hug him from behind. “Touring wouldn’t be safe, but performing? There are plenty of wolves right here who would love to see us play, and if we want to share our music with others, we can put it up on a streaming service. Was kinda leaning in that direction anyway. No way I could just leave my pups for days at a time, nor would I want to take them out into the human world with me.”

“You’re right,” Emery admitted. “I can’t picture you getting in that RV without them, but to take them wouldn’t be safe. Here is safe. It’s the safest place I’ve ever known.”

“Me too.”

The scent of lemon-ginger tea soon filled the small kitchen, and Emery inhaled deeply as steam rolled off the mug Zane set in front of him.

“If we want to keep it safe, keep you safe, you can’t leave any more messages for your mate,” Zane cautioned.

When they’d arrived on pack lands five months before, the thought of leaving a message for a mate would have had him laughing and mocking whoever had suggested it. Now, his wolf whined at the thought, his chest felt tight, and his stomach hurt. Tears made his eyes itch and he had to stare into his tea to keep Zane from seeing them.

“I know,” he whispered, voice trembling as he said it. It hurt. It really fuckin’ hurt. His wolf whined, mournful, and Emery gave up holding back his tears—not that he had to with Zane. His best friend sat down beside him and hugged him, stroking his hair and letting him cry himself out.

“You have to promise me, okay?” Zane said softly once Emery settled down and drank a few sips of his tea. “You have to say it, so I know you won’t break it.”

He’d had to do a lot of hard things in his life, and while it wasn’t the hardest, it destroyed something in him that he’d thought his family had kicked out of him a long time ago. Looking Zane in the eye, Emery let out a shaky breath. “I promise I won’t leave them any more messages. I won’t ask them to give me a chance and I’ll stop trying to find out who they are.”

Taking his hands, Zane gave them a little squeeze. “I hate that I had to ask you to do that. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s not your fault. It’s all on me. I’m a shitty person. No amount of name changing can erase that. Whoever my mate is, they’re right to protect themselves. I have too much evil blood running through my veins.”

“If you were evil, you would have stayed with them,” Zane pointed out. “You’d have waded into that sloth of bears and slaughtered relentlessly, not warned them of what was coming and told them how to find the Outlaws before they crossed onto the sloth’s land. You saved lives and risked your own to do it. Now your mate is risking your life without any consideration for what you might be running from. It isn’t fair. You’ve made mistakes. Who hasn’t? But you’ve been working hard to learn how to do better. Isn’t that supposed to be what’s important? That we grow from our experiences and avoid making the same mistakes?”

Emery nodded. “It’s supposed to be.”

“Then keep learning and keep working to do better every day. Don’t let the way they’ve chosen to act turn you into the wolf you never wanted to be,” Zane said.

“I won’t,” Emery promised. “Not when I have the chance to be an awesome uncle to an adorable little pup.”

“Pups.”

Freezing, Emery stared slack-jawed at Zane. “What?”

“We had our first appointment with Doc Washington this morning. He said my hormone levels indicate that there is more than one pup. We don’t know how many more yet, and my mates are kinda freaking out about it, but it sounds like I’m going to be an extremely fluffy bunny.”

Snickering, Emery had to admit the image that popped into his head each time he heard the term was adorable, and something he was looking forward to being a part of. Their tea was cold by the time they finished it, but that didn’t take away from how flavorful or refreshing it was.

“Is Dalton gonna be home soon?” Zane asked.

“Probably. He’s been sticking close to the place ever since that bear was killed south of town. Said he didn’t fancy being turned into a sieve should the wrong wolves take off after him.”

“I don’t blame him. Uncle Cage said there wasn’t much left of that bear after the MC got through with him.”

“It’s starting to feel less like they’re accidently crossing into pack territory and more like scouting parties gearing up for a hostile takeover.”

“If they are, they’re more like cannon fodder than spies,” Zane remarked. “A corpse isn’t much use in an invasion, is it?”

“Unless the whole point is to lull the pack into a false sense of security. Make us think we’re thinning the herd when all we’re doing is ridding them of their weakest members so the strong can sweep in here and wipe us out.”

“The Howling Devils will never let that happen. They’ll put an end to the Outlaws and any other group that thinks it can terrorize the pack.”

“Let’s just hope the bears don’t learn about them until they’ve already committed to whatever it is they have planned,” Emery said. “Maybe then, we can end whatever this is before wolves start getting hurt.”

“Long as the pack remembers to leave our bear alone, I’m good with it,” Zane remarked.

“Same.”

“Your bear would be good with it too,” Dalton grumbled as he stepped through the door, looking a bit ruffled and dusty.

“What happened?” they demanded, nearly crashing into each other in an effort to get to him. Emery put on the brakes to let Zane go to their bandmate first, not wanting to risk knocking him over.

“An overzealous visitor who didn’t know I was allowed to be here,” Dalton remarked as he brushed himself off. “Fortunately, JD happened to step into the new fish market before things got too heated and set everyone straight, though it’s been made clear to me that in the future, someone else should do the grocery shopping. Don’t be surprised if there’s a no bears allowed sign on the door when you go down to check the place out.”

“Forget them. The meat market stocks fish, too, and those guys have never had a problem with you,” Emery said. “If need be, we’ll just do our own fishing.”

“He’s right,” Zane added. “The ice is thawing and the fish have been biting all week. Cor’s been bringing home some nice-sized perch and walleye.”

“Might be a good way to spend the rest of the day,” Emery agreed.

“I’m up for it if you are,” Dalton said. “Question is, will the fluffy bunny be joining us?”

“For a little while,” Zane conceded. “Then I’ve got to get over to Dad’s. He’s going to show me the houses that are open so we can start thinking about where we want to move, and when we want to do it.”

“Soon, before you get too fluffy to waddle around and set things up the way you want,” Dalton said.

Zane sighed heavily.

“Okay, I know that look.” Dalton said. “What’s wrong?”

“How am I supposed to know how I want it? Or what I’d need?” Zane asked.

“Oh, well, that’s easy,” Emery said, dashing to his room and returning with a surprise for Zane.

“What are…?” Zane started to ask as Emery placed a stack of magazines in his hands. Some were home décor, and several were titled, Pups and Parents.

“Oh my god, thank you!” Zane shrieked, hugging Emery tight.

“Well played,” Dalton said, ruffling Emery’s hair.

“Nothing left to do now but go catch some fish,” Emery said.

“Let me grab a basket and change my boots,” Dalton said.

“He’s not gonna like it, but I’m gonna glue myself to his side until things calm down.”

“You’re right, he’s not going to like it,” Zane said. “The bears are as much a threat to him as they are to the pack.”

“And we both know that if there was a threat to this pack, he’d be on the front lines fighting to protect it,” Emery said.

“I just wish the rest of the pack knew that.”

“Same,” Zane replied as he pulled his coat back on, then tossed Emery his.

They were waiting by the door when Dalton emerged. At first glance, it would be easy to mistake him for a member of the MC. It was only once someone caught a whiff of him would they realize he wasn’t wolf. Too bad they couldn’t spray him with wolf scent so everyone would leave him the hell alone.

Or could they?

Emery pondered that as they headed down to the RV. It had potential, if such a thing existed. Making up his mind to research it later tonight, he climbed into the RV and sat on the couch near the front, Zane sliding into the seat next to him.

“The bakery is adding a coffee counter and juice bar,” Zane announced as they got underway. “It’s supposed to be up and running by the end of the week.”

“Do I even want to ask how much you’re going to owe him for treats and drinks?” Dalton chuckled.

“Nuthin’,” Zane remarked coyly.

“And how is that?”

“Onyx is a member of the MC,” Zane replied, smirking. “So, I’m trading music. He’d love to have live entertainment for the afternoon crowd and open mic night. Speaking of which, I need someone to accompany me. Know anyone with a guitar and some free time?”

“Do you even have to ask? Let me know the times, and I’ll be there.”

“Will do.”

“Thanks, man, seriously. I need something to do with my time when I’m not volunteering in the kitchen,” Emery admitted.

“And this way, you still get to perform.”

As Dalton bounced them along the road to the pond, all Emery could do was hug Zane, and thank every god in the universe that the little wolf had forgiven him for his fuckups when Zane’s mates had first come into his life.

“Don’t know what I’d do without you,” Emery whispered.

Zane just hugged him tighter. “You’ll never have to find out.”

“Are we fishing out the back today?” Dalton asked.

The frost boils in the road were a bit rougher here. They were going to need a more practical vehicle for getting around pack grounds now that they were extending their stay indefinitely.

“Might as well. This thing serves us well doubling as a supersized fishing shack,” Emery responded.

“Yeah, it does,” Zane said.

Where once Zane would have bounded down the aisle before Dalton was done parking, now he remained beside Emery until the RV came to a complete halt. Emery squeezed him close and kissed the side of his head.

“What’d I do to deserve that?” Zane asked, leaning into him.

“Aside from just being you,” Emery said, “I see you changing every day to get ready for those little ones. You’re gonna be an awesome dad.”

“He’s right,” Dalton said as he walked past them down the aisle to the back window of the RV, which he removed and set aside so they could fish out of it. “I’m not sure you realize the little things you’ve become more conscientious of, but we do.”

Zane just smiled that super megawatt smile of his and sat on the edge of a bench overlooking the window. Emery took the one across from him while Dalton took the top bunk, the three of them baiting their poles and getting situated.

“Remember the night we got ahold of that watermelon moonshine, and Wild got it in his head that we should take a walk along the river while we drank,” Dalton mused.

“Oh my god, ghost fish,” Zane laughed. “I had nightmares for a week.”

“We know,” Emery remarked, shaking his head at the memory. “You woke us up shoving your cold-ass nose in our backs as you climbed onto a bunk with one of us.”

“In hindsight, we were a bunch of fools,” Dalton said. “Of course, silver fish in the moonlight were gonna glow. We could have broken our damn fool necks fleeing back to the RV like a pack of hellhounds were after us.”

“Pretty sure Wild was the one most in danger of that, the way he was flying all crazy and shit,” Zane said, giggling.

“I swore he was gonna go into a tailspin and land beak-first right on one of those fish after he clipped that tree,” Emery reminisced.

“He coulda been the poster owl for the ‘Don’t drink and fly campaign’,” Zane said.

“Who knows? He still could be, the way he was downing shots at the Den last night,” Dalton said. “He and Tobias lined up a row of twenty-one and raced to the center shot.”

“Who won?” Emery asked.

Snickering, Dalton raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you even have to ask? Wild drank him under the table, then dragged him out and carried him home.”

Laughing, Zane still managed to set his hook and start reeling in the first fish. “Dayum!”

“Pretty much,” Dalton remarked. “These days, I never see Wild without Tobias. I’m beginning to wonder if our owl is gonna wind up with a four-legged mate.”

“How awesome would that be? Tobias is amazing, and it seems like him and Wild clicked from day one,” Zane said. “They’d be perfect together.”

Thinking about it, Emery had to admit that they fit. Heads always touching, hands aways gesturing, every time he saw them they were whispering and laughing like they had a language all their own. As much as his own situation sucked, Emery was happy for Wild. Like Zane, Wild had been through hell before joining the band. He deserved to be happy and loved. From what little Emery knew of interspecies pairings, offspring were rare, but not impossible. So maybe Emery would never have mates and little ones of his own, but he could learn how to be the best damned uncle ever to the pups, owlets, and perhaps even cubs of his amazing band family.

Click on the covers to see the previous books in the Comet Lake Chronicles

   
 





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